Is there life out there...

When I was younger I heard the song by Reba McEntire; I think that's when it started! Reba happened to be the first live concert I saw. I believe that "Fancy" was my favorite song of hers at the time- but this one hit me hard when I heard it.
"She married, when she was 20, she thought she was ready, now she's not so sure...  she thought she'd done some living, now she's just wondering what she's living for, she's wondering if there's something more... She's done what she should, should she do what she dares...  She's always lived for tomorrow, she's never learned how to live for today. she's dying to try something foolish, do something crazy, or just get away... ooh, something for herself for a change... there's a place in the sun that she's never been where life is fair and time is her friend, would she do it the same as she did back then... Is there life out there- so much she hasn't done, is there life beyond her family & her home.
Well, without quoting the entire song! ...I'll just say I've always had this fear of settling and this notion that there's more out there. I swore to myself once that I would have to prove to myself that I could make it out in this great big world by myself before getting married and having kids. And, for some reason, it seemed to me like everyone just kind of quit or gave up on life's great adventure & I didn't want to be one of those people either. I didn't want to just get married to a nice guy who would work a meaningless job to provide a home so we can have some kids & take them to soccer & buy them things. (I don't really know where I got the idea that that's what my life would have to amount to... I think it's weird I think like that! Or that that's what really happens or that jobs are meaningless.. it's just a childish perspective! And, honestly, I wouldn't mind that life -some of the time!!) Meanwhile, I've always looked for some man to come sweep me off my feet & rescue me. I've learned through the years that no one can rescue me. I've also learned that I think I've proved myself enough.
 I have recently realized how instead of looking at my life- I throw myself into everyone elses'- whether it's by facebook or emails or letters or phone calls or pinterest or whatever. I have also learned that I'm not missing out. I mean, wherever you are- you're missing out on something! But, if you're truly in your moment, in your life, you're not missing out on anything because everything you need is in that moment you're living!
Now I'm torn between the comfort of being close to family & a life of new adventure. Either way, life is an adventure and we learn and grow if we choose- wherever we are. I SO admire the people who can stay where they are-in the jobs & relationships they have, and continue to grow and find themselves and be happy. We've got to live- wherever we are, make ourselves happy wherever. Still, I find myself listening to songs like these tonight... hoping for a sign!!!;)
Mary May & Bobby
California life alone is just too hard to build... 
...Somehow she always knew she had the strength inside, even if she fell- she'd survive...Inspite of all the tears she may cry, this is how she has to live her life. As hard as it might be, she had to find out for herself...
...she's nobodys girl...
And reading signs like these:
You're NOT missing out...
The grass is always greener... if it's greener, you might need to spend some time in your own yard.
Wherever you go, there you are.
Get out of your head and into your body!
Do something for yourself that does not involve technology.

*side-note.. I found this one in my 'draft' box! Wrote it 21 days ago!! Thought I'd post it anyhow!!!