Hope ...& Stuff

So, you know when everything seems so chaotic and like all things in your life are in a big traffic jam. Then, all of a sudden, from out of nowhere... something clicks & gives you great perspective. Suddenly you realize that all the things you're trying to make work aren't working because you can do way better- you're meant to do way more. You're settling instead of dreaming. Or, that the things you dream of aren't being achieved because you're trying to make legitimate sense of it all or control it all or fear has got you down?! Well, that's what's been happening here lately. I have a way of living with what's right in front of my face instead of through all the worldly possibilities. Like this is all there is- this is all I have to work with.. maybe if I did this here & then shove this there & then maybe if he were a bit more like that or if I could shift that... you know how it goes! And then poof... you let go & open your heart and realize... there's more. You're trying to make the whole soup with only 3 ingredients! ...Not that you can't make a decent soup with 3 ingredients but you know- why not go to the store, or pick in your garden, or ask your friends to bring stuff over... the possibilities are endless!:)
Speaking of soup... we made some for dinner! It's the kind of stew that doesn't make a small batch. It's raining here tonight and it seemed so cozy. We made pumpkin muffins for breakfast too! Oh, how I love fall weather (even in Southern California!) and the smell of pumpkin! So then for dinner in the rain, we lit candles and invited the neighbors... a few of them came... and we enjoyed a meal & enjoyed the rain & enjoyed our time together.
I realize how blessed we are and how great the world is. I realize that there's more and that I'm not in control. I realize how much more exciting the possibilities are when you're not limiting yourself. And when we can be genuine & authentic & kind & generous ...the world will sometimes be those things back! ...and even if not, it feels so much better to be those things. Like the gentleman yesterday who stopped me in the store to tell my I had a great smile. He didn't even linger to try & make small talk or awkward conversation! One little gesture made my whole day. The thought that someone could be so kind just for the sake of being kind... that kind of stuff gives me hope! And we have to live with hope in our hearts.